Towards Thriving Cover

June 23, 2016

Our hearts and deepest sympathies are with the grieving family, friends, and everyone affected by the horrific attack in Orlando last week. Today, and every day, the Idaho Coalition works to end all forms of domination and violence, including homophobia, transphobia, and Islamophobia. How can we prevent this from ever happening again? That’s a question many of us are asking in the wake of the shooting. There were clear signs. And many were the same signs we’ve seen over and over again in the lead up to previous acts of violence.

Not long after news broke that Omar Mateen was responsible for the Orlando attack, his ex-wife told the media: “He was not a stable person. He beat me. He would just come home and start beating me up because the laundry wasn’t finished or something like that.”

We cannot ignore the targeting of the LGBTQ community or communities of color. And we cannot ignore the role of domestic violence in mass killings because there is a long-established pattern: men who are arrested for violent acts often began with attacks against their girlfriends and wives. In many cases, the charges of domestic violence were not taken seriously or were dismissed.

By intervening early and stopping violence in the home, we not only ensure the safety of the women and children who are the first victims. We can also take steps to make it harder for anyone to go on to commit additional violence, whether inside or outside the home.

We need to continue to take actions against so much darkness. To paraphrase Move to End Violence faculty member Norma Wong, darkness has so much energy it can draw you in. However, darkness to fight darkness does not work. It is not strategic. When we are triggered to retaliate, we only generate more darkness. The bravest thing is to stand for light. We can make a choice about what we stand for – and we stand for communities connected by love and compassion, a world where everyone can be their authentic selves and thrive.

Towards thriving,
Kelly Miller
Idaho Coalition Against Sexual & Domestic Violence

Stalking Civil Protection Order

Beginning July 1st, individuals who are stalked, who experience malicious harassment or telephone harassment are now eligible to apply for civil orders of protection under new code section I.C. § 18-7907. Senator Grant Burgoyne introduced the legislation this year and worked in collaboration with, among others, the Idaho Coalition, the Women’s and Children’s Alliance, the Idaho Prosecuting Attorney’s Association, the Sheriff’s Association and the Idaho Chiefs of Police.

The new forms for the civil protection order are scheduled to be ready through the Court Assistance Office online as well as from the clerk’s office at the courthouses. The final forms are set to be approved at the Supreme Court’s Oral Conference on June 24th.

The following definitions are included on the new forms:

  • Stalking means repeated acts of nonconsensual contact that alarms, annoys, or harasses another person causing the person emotional distress, fear of death, physical injury or fear of death or physical injury of a family or household member.
  • Malicious harassment means to intimidate or harass another person to cause physical injury, damage, destroy or deface real or personal property or the threat thereof due to a person’s race, color, religion, ancestry, or national origin.
  • Telephone harassment is the use of telephone to annoy, terrify, threaten, intimidate, harass or offend by lewd or profane language, requests, suggestions or proposals, threats of physical harm or disturbing the peace by repeated calls.

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The new civil protection order creates protections for individuals who are stalked who previously did not qualify under Idaho Law because they were not a current or former intimate partner, related by blood or marriage, or in a dating relationship. We know that approximately 50% of individuals who are stalked are stalked by someone who is not an intimate partner- typically an acquaintance. Those individuals are now eligible to apply for a protection order.

Additionally, domestic violence victims who previously did not meet the threshold of imminent danger, but who are experiencing stalking, malicious harassment or telephone harassment are eligible to apply under the stalking portion of the order.

The new law states that individuals who experienced stalking as well as domestic violence shall not have to fill out two separate applications. Thus, the new civil order of protection – regardless of the relationship with the respondent–is included on the current civil order of protection petition. Petitions will just choose whether they are applying for a protection order as a result of stalking or malicious harassment or if they are applying as a victim of domestic violence.

To apply for relief under the stalking, malicious harassment or telephone harassment section, individuals must have experienced a pattern of behavior that meets the current definitions of stalking, malicious or telephone harassment and must have experienced the behavior within the last 90 days.

The relief available through the order includes the same provisions within the domestic violence. The two reliefs that will be most applicable to individuals who are being stalked or harassed include the first two provisions: the personal conduct order prohibiting the respondent from harassing, stalking, annoying, disturbing the peace of, telephone, contact or otherwise communicate with (either directly or indirectly, in person or through any other person) the protected person(s) and the Stay Away Order, ordering the respondent to stay away from certain addresses. There are also reliefs available such as temporary custody, ordering the respondent to counseling and “other reliefs requested”

The Idaho Coalition will host a webinar on Wednesday June 29th at 10:00 a.m. to review these new forms and the relief available to petitions, as well as review the dynamics of stalking. Please register here. We will record this webinar and send it out to programs if you are not able to make the meeting.

The Idaho Coalition has been a member of the Domestic Violence Courts Subcommittee and the workgroup tasked with devising these new forms. We anticipate, that with any new form, there will be some confusion and questions that come up as this rolls out within the court system. We are committed to working through these situations as they arise for you and your program. Please contact Jennifer Landhuis or 384-0419 x 303 if you have any questions or concerns.

2016 National Latin@ Institute

This week, nine Idaho women attended the 2016 National Latin@ Network InstituteNational Latin@ Institute: Strengthening Our Communities, sponsored by Casa de Esperanza: National Latin@ Network. The institute provided participants with significant opportunities for networking, resource and expertise sharing and critical discussions on traditionally challenging topics. The event was conceived for all Latin@s and their allies working together to end family and community violence- gender-based violence- and other forms of oppression.

Nine women from Idaho- four advocates from The Advocates, Bingham Crisis Center, Domestic Violence & Sexual Assault Center, and Safe Passage together with three organizers from Mujeres Unidas and two Idaho Coalition staff attended the three day conference. The conference enhanced participants ability to provide individual, systems and community advocacy based in critical analysis of diversity as well as connect with other organizations and activists to advance our individual and collective practice.

We are humbled and grateful for the work these individuals and all of you are doing to advance the collective voices of individuals who experience domestic and sexual violence.

Boise Pridefest 2016

We will continue to come together towards a vision of liberation and equity. We know that the pathway is love over hate, love over violence, love as the most revolutionary of acts.

In solidarity with the LGBTQ community. Love and power of the people. This too is Idaho.

The United State of Women

“This is what a feminist looks like.” – President Obama speaking at the United State of WomenObama_This_is_what_a_feminist_looks_like

Last week I was honored to be invited to the United State of Women in Washington DC. It was a day-long event with President Obama, First Lady Michelle Obama, Vice President Joe Biden, Oprah Winfrey and others discussing violence against women, education, economics, and other issues impacting the status of women in our country.

“I may be a little grayer than I was eight years ago,” President Obama said to the room of 5,000, “but this is what a feminist looks like.” President Obama talked about the social norms that create a culture of violence. “We need to keep changing the attitude that raises our girls to be demure and our boys to be assertive, he said. That criticizes our daughters for speaking out and our sons for shedding a tear. We need to change the attitude that punishes women for their sexuality, but gives men a pay on the back for theirs. We need to keep changing the attitude that congratulates men for changing a diaper, stigmatizes full time dads, penalizing working moms”.

– Kelly Miller

Radical Self-Care

Go Pee — Join the Self-Care Revolution!Go Pee -- Join the Self-Care Revolution!

Ever heard yourself or someone else say: “I haven’t had a chance to pee all day!”? Are YOU holding it in right now?

For those of us scheduling back to back meetings or appointments with no spaciousness for thinking, much less other critical bodily functions, not having to pee can seem like a great convenience. Of course, what it tells us is that you are not hydrating sufficiently and your body is not getting what it needs to function at its peak performance.

Your mind and body are intimately connected. Think of it this way: If your bladder isn’t charging on all cylinders, neither is your mind.

Today’s Challenge – Note how many times you go to the bathroom. If you’re not going at least once in a 3-4 hour block, drink more water! Psst. If you are proudly peeing due to the amount of caffeine you are drinking, this is your friendly reminder that coffee, doesn’t count as water. Try to replace at least one of those split-shot americanos or double soy lattes with a nice, refreshing cup of H2O.

Deepen Your Practice Check out the color of your pee before you flush: the lighter, the better! Yeah. We went there.

Training & Events

Stalking Civil Protection Order Webinar
June 29th at 10:00 MST
This webinar will discuss the new civil protection orders which will be available starting July 1, 2016. We will discuss who is eligible, what reliefs are available to a petitioner, as well as the forms to apply.
Register Now

Happy Retirement Sylvia

Sylvia Retirement“Congratulations Sylvia Evers on your retirement after 17 wonderful years of dedicated service to our community,and the mission of the YWCA. You will be missed.”

– Leslee Grubb, YWCA of Lewiston-Clarkston Board President